aurelia alviana Fedora
Dear readers (ececehhhhh!!!),

Pardon for the foul languages in my previous post and another previous post, honestly I can't control my temper when I am in the *not-s0-good* season. There are so many things that can spark my flame of anger easily. Just say what you want. You name it. Almost everything is related to it, including the tiniest bit of issue such as food. Mind you, I can be extremely sensitive when the time's not right.

I'm giving up to so many things lately. I keep on hoping, and I keep on getting things that I least expected. In other words, I keep on getting things I never expected. When things get rough, I keep on asking myself, what is wrong with me? Why is it I am the one to be blamed? I admit that I am not perfect. I am not Gaia. I am not Demeter. I am not Aphrodite, and obviously I am not Athena. Duhh. I am just a normal girl with high ambitions that can never be achieved till today (because obviously I am a lazy-bone. Bahahaha.) But then, why am I never getting the things that I expected, even once? I am not Medusa who can petrify everyone whoever looks at her. Or... am I a cannibal? Duhh! Please!

I never admit this, but I miss him ;( I keep on listening to this song (refer to my previous post) and suddenly, I said to myself, how I wish him to be here, because I need hugs ;( and of course, kisses. I miss those times. I need his words to encourage me to be stronger in facing trials and challenges I least expect. All those things; backstabbing, bad mouthing and bloody bla..bla..bla.. shows no signs of ending. I need peace. I need something to soothe my unsettling mind. Somebody can help me untangling the mess in my head? Nah, don't trouble yourself. You can't even see the starting point, so what's the worth of doing it anyway?

It's no use writing longer posts when your heart is full of anger. I think I'm going to recite my Divine Mercy before I go to bed. Hmm. 0008 hours. Time to hibernate and rest my mind. See you in the morning peeps! :)
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