aurelia alviana Fedora


Notice that the title of the post is written in total small fonts? This is because this is a part of my life which I never tried to embrace, and never will be. I tried to place it as far as I can so that I won't have to remember the dark memory, but I just can't. In fact, I will never can. No one knows that I'm a victim of sexual harrassment. To be exact, almost being raped.  I mean it. Even at the moments I type this entry, I can't ignore the facts that I was one and I can't change the fact. It left a very deep impact because the doer was a close friend of mine. And this happened 5 years back; yes, when I was in Form 4. More surprisingly, in a class in a school.

Now to think the fact that I am a teacher-to-be, I keep on reminiscing back the days only if I told the teachers what that friend of mine did to me. Not only me, but other friends as well. What if one day later a student came up to me and say that she was sexually harrassed? What if she experienced the incident that's alike to mine? How am I going to help that student? I wouldn't want her to be blame, anyway. Especially if she's just like the younger me. But the main issue here is, how am I going to help her if I can't help myself anyway?

I've learned a meaningful lesson from that incident. A lesson which I think I will keep it to myself, and will share it to everyone when the time comes. For now, I just need to find solutions for my own problem. Supposed you don't want a problematic teacher to help you with your problems, right? Fingers-crossed everything's going to be all right ahead of me then...
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