aurelia alviana Fedora

Yupp. That's me. Alviana. 20 going on to 21 very soon... and that is about more or less TWO WEEKS from now!! Yo man, that's too soon! Random facts about me? 1. I'm almost 21 but yet I still dont own a driving licence. Pity me. 2. I'm an ex-SAINSRIan (SMS Miri), an ex-NSian (NS stands for National Service [PLKN]), ex-LMCian (for three months only), and present MARJONian a.k.a TESLian. 3. I miss my foundation hair. My long hair. Me very de long hair. Honestly, I regret cutting my hair before but let's just bygones be bygones. After all, my hair's getting longer now :) though it's not as long as before :(

I flipped through my pictures in Facebook just now, and I noticed that MOST OF MY PICTURES SHOW THE HAPPY FACES OF ME. Suddenly I feel like I'm an idiot. A hypocrite. What the heck. I feel pissed off, but there aren't any pictures that shows the me pissed of pictures. I feel sad, but there aren't any pictures that show me crying. Am I a person who is happy all the time? Am I a person who never cares if people mock me or not, if people just took my efforts for granted? Alviana, wake up and don't ever suppress your feelings! Let it out! Let all the people around you know how do you feel about them!

But honestly, I just can't do it. I really, really can't do it. I feel like I wanted to cry, but I can't. I feel like pissing off, but I can't show it. Honestly, I can't. Human rights policy? My policy is LET ME JUST KEEP IT TO MYSELF. After all, it's useless when you have talk thousand times and yet people still repeat the same thing as if they are capable of doing that all on their own...or should I say AS IF THEY FEEL THEY ARE TOO GREAT? Only God knows.

There are many things I wanted to jot down in this entry but the clock struck quarter to two in the morning. Of course it's not a problem since I'll have class only at one in the afternoon for tomorrow, but I don't feel well right now. It's either a) I was overslept or b) i need more rest. Well, I think I'll be up to something in the upcoming entry. Just you wait. :) Till then, cheers!
2 Responses

  1. :) there are times i am not able to pretend that i am happy. yes, i am but what's the point if i pretend to be happy just to satisfy other people's feeling? huhuhu... xde kaitan dgn yg hidup mahupun yg dh meninggal dunia k :)